Raising Kids:
Parenting Skills for the 21st Century
Sex Education
Another very controversial aspect of parenting is sex education. How much, when and how to get it done are key questions. Equally controversial is what role school should play in discussing these sensitive topics with your children.
Below are some recommendations from one parent to another that are based on real experience with our children who have all done well understanding what they needed to understand at the right ages.
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Protect your childrens' innocence - Keep your kids from being exposed to details about sexuality in movies, books, music, etc. before they have reached an age that's appropriate. Childrens' minds are like a blank slate that can be indelibly marked upon for life with images and information that is harmful to them. Pay attention to ratings on movies and video games. Read reviews on the internet from trusted sources. Talk to family members about their experiences with the material.
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Decide when to discuss the birds and bees with your kids. If you never have this discussion with your kids, the only thing you know for sure is that they have not heard what they should hear from you. Do not leave it up to your childrens' teachers or worse, their friends, to explain these important topics to them. No matter how well intentioned these sources may be, they will never hold your child's interest as closely as you do.
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Be involved with what's being taught at school. Most schools require a permission slip before discussing sex education with your children. Before signing any permission slip, ask to see the curriculum to insure it is in line with your values. If you do not feel as a parent that your children should be exposed to the information the way the school presents it, keep your child out of the lesson. This is your right as a parent.
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Teach kids what they need to know to be safe. Be honest with your kids about the dangers that exist in the world including the evils of child preditors and rape. Teach them what to do if they ever get in a situation where they could be in danger. This can be done in an age approporiate way and several videos and books exist on the topic. When your kids have knowledge of what intercourse is, teach them about STDs and the ways to prevent them, starting with abstinence. Explaining what condoms are and the benefits they offer does not need to be an endorsement of their use. Above all, encourage your kids to think of sex as an activity that should be reserved for marriage or at the very least a committed, adult relationship.
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Designate other adults for your kids to talk with. It is a fact that many kids will find it difficult to talk with their parents about these topics. It can sometimes be helpful to designate a trusted family member such as an aunt, uncle, or adult sibling to take questions and explain anything that's confusing.
Being sensitive to what your kids need to know and when they need to know it is the key to helping them to develop into adults who are well adjusted in their knowledge and perceptions of sexuality.
Internet/TV/Music
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